Wednesday, January 28, 2015

March 1, 2013.

That was my last post. Huh.

So much life is squeezed into every day these days. I am still grateful for life. I am still grateful for the lessons I'm learning. But there is a but.

...BUT I am tired. Even with a good night's sleep or two, I am simply tired.

Who was I a handful of years ago...when I thought I could have a fast-paced, exciting career that challenged me, stimulated me, using my God-given gifts to make a difference?

Who was I when I knew what was happening in my friends' and family's lives. . .and was there for them? Not to mention what was happening in my city, state, world? 

Who was I when I vowed to not let "special needs" define me, my child or my family?

Who was I when I thought having three kids would be hard, but manageable?

What IS that word any more? Man...age...a....ble. Hmmm.

Life has a million and one ways to make it so very hard to make life-giving choices.

And yet, I know this is not forever. Just a REALLY LONG STRETCH of challenge that I need to figure out how to enjoy because in 20 years I will wish I was back at this point.

I just hope I don't spend the next 20 years wondering Who was I . . .

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